The Story of Becoming… The Hard Way

Today, while I was on my way to the gym, thinking about some things that I like to avoid thinking about (worrying), I was listening to ‘Test Drive’ by John Powell. It’s the song that plays when Hiccup is taking Toothless out on a test drive in How to Train Your Dragon. The scene is one of the most exciting I have ever seen, and the music itself is one of my favorites. Listening to it makes me feel like I’m the one on the dragon’s back, going fast with the wind in my hair, as the world lies beneath me, and the sky swallows me up. It’s a great song.

If you haven’t listened to it before, here you go (you’re going to need to for this post to make some sense, I suppose):

And it’s when those two things crossed paths (me worrying about future hardships while listening to Test Drive), that something wonderful occurred to me.

Okay. So, whenever I listen to Test Drive, I always have to endure the part from 1:20-1:52. It’s not my favorite part. In fact, when I first properly listened to the song (which was right after I first watched the movie), I kind of wished that part wasn’t in the song. Though I quickly chastised myself for having that thought because “this song is perfect, and nothing you say will ever change that.” But still, to this day, it always feels like I’m enduring that part (though this is consciously thought subconsciously). Like I’m waiting for it to finish so we could get back to the better parts of the song. But, today, while I was on my way to the gym, I realized that the part I look forward to the most is the part right after the one I have to endure. And then it occurred to me that the part I look forward to probably wouldn’t carry the same weight it does if it didn’t come right after the part I have to endure. And, I mean, the beginning of the song is great. I get goosebumps every time the song begins. It’s powerful, and it’s booming, but it’s not like the part I look forward to. The beginning of the song is smooth sailing. A great adventure. You feel free, and let-go. Like you’re safely free-falling into a gigantic sky. And then the part I have to endure starts to play, and it sounds loud, and panic-y, and like you’re sinking into solid ground, as if you were in a nightmare. It’s a bit scary.

But then.

Then, the part I look forward to starts to play, and it’s epic. Especially the part that starts playing at 2:00. It sounds like those moments when you get a sudden burst of strength to carry on doing what it is you were doing, despite the struggle. To fight back. To not let it bring you down. And it sounds exactly like the beginning of this song, but it’s intensified. It’s a statement. “I will not allow you take away from my being.” It’s thunderous, and it’s monumental. It’s heroic.

And, it was while I was thinking that, that I made a link between those thoughts and my worrying. Maybe my hardships are those 32 seconds of music I have to endure. Which would make the me after those hardships the part I look forward to in the song. And while the beginning of the song is great in and of itself (i.e. my life without hardships), I don’t think I’d like to miss the opportunity of being something greater.

It’s just a thought I had.

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