Some Honest, Random, & Frivolous Thoughts

1- I think my friend doesn’t tell me what she thinks about the songs that I recommend to her because she doesn’t like them and does not want to lie about liking them to me.

2- Are dictionaries all the same? If I were to look up a word in two different dictionaries, would they both define the word the exact same way? Word for word?

3- I am glad I know where I stand with X. I am glad that our friendship is no longer a source of pain and insecurity for me. I am glad that it feels like it’s been ages since I had her up on that pedestal. I am glad I don’t feel any resentment towards her.

4- I am worried that I am becoming a person who just waits for, and expects, the people in her life to walk away. I am worried that I’m going to just accept this.

5- I am glad that I’m posting this. (Hopefully)

6- “Blurryface” is really good. I will not delve deeper into that statement.

7- I really need to improve my Arabic.

8- Is Zayn Malik leaving 1D really a stunt? Do I want to be the kind of person who cares?

9- On that note, I am looking forward to seeing how this “stunt” unfolds.

10- I am surprised that no one has really asked me why I haven’t continued to watch GoT.

11- It makes me happy that Buzz knew why without having to ask. It surprised me, actually. And I’m grateful that she let me know. “It’s okay. You know that, right? It… it doesn’t… it doesn’t have to- it doesn’t mean anything.” I’m still trying to figure out if it does, Buzz.

12- I’m happy that “Warm Foothills” by Alt-J was playing as I wrote that.

13- Thinking about the presentations I’m going to have to do next year makes me nervous- and grateful (really grateful) for this 3 month long summer vacation. God bless.

14- I’m excited for Ramadan. Did you guys know I’m Muslim?

15- I’m happy that Bog mentioned me on her instagram pic. It makes me smile.

16- But I’m sorta bummed that she didn’t reply to my awesome comment on said instagram pic.

17- For a while, I took my friendship with you for granted. I regret that. I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.

18- I worry that I’m a source of annoyance and frustration to my piano teacher. I never do things on time.

19- I sometimes feel that I come off as a bit intense, and I worry that it tends to put people off.

20- I am terrified of next year’s 2nd term.

21- I do not know if that previous statement is true. Which is weirding me out, because, how can Iย not know? It’s such a silly thing to not know. People are out there not knowing deeper things about themselves, and here I am not knowingย this.ย 

22- I feel like I’ve reached a point where I am neutral about most things. This worries me.

23- I think your relationship with people is sorta like a painting. Everything you do, no matter how big or small, is just a new coat of paint, or a different color added to the canvas. And it all counts. Every stroke of the brush, every drop of color. It all makes the painting what it is.

24- How short would I look next to someone who is 5’11 feet tall? (I am 5’4)

25- Sometimes I really think I can pull off this whole “being a lawyer” thing (one day). Other days, I don’t. Without the “really”.

26- Am I ever going to write a book?

27- I wonder how many strangers I’ve passed that have had a direct connection to me? Like, this is your dentist’s best friend. Or, that person over there is your teacher’s old school mate. Or, this person sitting across from you is going to be one of your closest friends in a couple of months, Farah. You are not prepared.

28- I wonder how much pain Mama and Daddy have had to hide from me and my sister.

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9 thoughts on “Some Honest, Random, & Frivolous Thoughts

  1. Wow this was quite a deep post! I loved it! interesting to see some of your thoughts, which is a very brave thing to do, to share them on the internet, kudos to you:)!

    I completely agree with number 8 and 9. Oh and hahah, I’m about 5″11! How funny! xxx

    • Number 8 & 9 have sorta taken over my life. I BLAME TUMBLR. What are your thoughts on whole thing? Do you think he’ll be coming back? I honestly don’t know anymore. I just want them all to be happy. (It would also be nice if everyone online would stop tearing each other apart about the whole thing.)
      Also, WOW! You’re quite tall (mashaAllah), which is sorta messing with the image I have of you in my head. It’s like I have to re-imagine every thought I’ve had of you, just to add a few inches. Is that weird? Probably.

      • Hahaha I honestly don’t care about them that much. Good music, but that’s it hahaha! I wish I was taller, I’m surrounded by giants (not family wise) at, ahh hows the fasting going? I’m guessing you’re muslim from the “MashAllah” terminology! I’m fasting once I come back from Prague, which is what i’m currently packing for…you wouldn’t believe I leave in less than 12 hours for the airport! hahaha xxx

      • I WISH I FELT THE SAME WAY ABOUT THIS STUPID BAND OF BOYS.
        You’re 5’11 and you’d like to be taller because you’re surrounded by giants. I think I’d like to relocate to where you’re at. I can’t imagine being surrounded by so many TALL PEOPLE. Not that the people around me are necessarily short, they’re just not TALL.
        And fasting’s going great! Ramadan’s my favourite time of year, and the days aren’t that long where I’m at.
        From the “I’m fasting once I come back from Prague” I’m guessing you’re Muslim too. Hello, fellow Muslim, how are you? C:
        I hope you have a wonderful time in Prague, btw! Can’t wait to read all about it (or hear all about it, if you’ll be making a vlog instead of post). HAVE FUN! xxxx

      • Hahaha Good old one D.

        Yes it’s true! I mean, I do love the height I am, but yes I wish i could be couple inches taller ๐Ÿ˜‰ Aww, but being smaller also has it’s benefits! ๐Ÿ™‚ haha Yes I am, I’m good, and yourself?! We open the fast in about 1/2 hour, which is exciting for the house, what about you?

        Ahh thank you ๐Ÿ™‚ I’ll be doing a bit of both, but I’m making it a Summer Resolution to vlog more, and to start off i’ll be doing it in Prague! ๐Ÿ˜€ Thankls ๐Ÿ˜€ xxx

  2. #23 is so good. Wow, I love that thought.
    #26 I wonder this, too. I used to write a lot and now I don’t. I wonder what it is that has made me lose my creativity and willingness to write. I wish I could get it back. Maybe I should work on that.
    #27 is so cool! I wish we could know these things for real…
    #28 Parents have secrets that I don’t think we’ll ever know. My family has been through some stuff and I wish I knew the whole unedited story. I think it’s important to know all the pain and struggle, it makes us appreciate the present even more.

    • I think you’d make a good writer. I think, if I didn’t know of you, I’d still pick up a book that you’d written. I hope you find/experience something that will awaken your creative drive and get you to write. Whatever it is.
      And I think about #27, a lot. Tbh, I think about it a lot in the sense of “the significant other”. Have we crossed paths? Is he right under my nose? This person exists right now (hopefully!) and is doing something somewhere in this world, WHAT IS IT? (Psssst: I’m sorta a romantic.)
      And parents hide a lot of things to make things easier and better for us. Which is why it’s important to appreciate them and be understanding towards them when they do things that we don’t necessarily… understand, or agree with. (I try very hard to remind myself of that whenever I have an argument with my one of my parents.)
      And #23 is a thought I’d like to elaborate on more. I think I might make a post on it. We’ll see. YOU FLATTER ME, ERA.

      • Aw, thanks for saying you’d read my future book ๐Ÿ™‚
        Yes, make a blog post for #23. Also, wow I think about #27 and my future significant other, too!! I’m so curious! Funny (and frustrating) how we can’t know these things. Oh, there’s this move called Timer where people got branded with these timers on their wrists and the timers count down the days and hours until they meet their soulmate. When they get put on you, it shows that you could meet them 5 years from that moment or even just 3 hours from that moment. It was such an interesting concept! Can you imagine just waking up one day and knowing that your timer is at its end, and today you’ll meet your soulmate….AHH MOVIES. I think you’d like it. It’s on Netflix, if you have it.

      • THAT WOULD BE SO… I HAVE NO IDEA. I can’t even begin to think of the possibilities and occurrences of that world. Like it would be cool. But it could also be… I don’t even know. What happens if your soulmate dies?

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